Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Same old Dick

By Capt Fogg

I'm rather tired of the false familiarity politicians sometimes use when trying to sound like one of the guys; as though they'd really rather be called Dick than Richard or even "Mr. Vice President" because power and status are uncomfortable to these log cabin born rail splitters with dung on their boots. I'm always happy to call our current VP Dick however, although the opportunity isn't likely to present itself unless we have another hurricane in my part of Florida this summer.

I was beginning to think for a while that Dick was in ill health or that George had sent him to his room so as not to embarrass the party, but he's back. He's back with the same old "go F*** yourself" attitude, the same old so what response to the will of the country he was elected to serve and the same old authoritarianism in conservative clothing. Like most mythological creations of religious organizations do, Dick speaks in parables and his latest and most overused parable seems to be tale of the democratically elected hero who knows much more and much better than does the peasantry about what needs to be done and so steps outside his job description and like a fat Napoleon, on to a white marble horse.

Gerald Ford, says Dick, exhibited the same sort of heroism in pardoning the other great Dick of American History that he and his administration did by fabricating a story requiring us to invade, demolish, pillage and occupy Iraq. Let's not be so formal as to call this sophistry, let's continue with the familiarity thing and call it a foul, stinking, crock of shit and worse: an effort to advance the cause of paternalistic, authoritarian and yes, imperial government. Of course no one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of Americans and especially that of Republicans, but it shouldn't be too difficult to recognize that pardoning a cheap, chiseling, neurotic and alcoholic crook like Nixon could never have the same kind or degree of repercussions or involve the same kind of human and financial costs as did and does our occupation of Iraq.

But if anyone still needs help, arguing that because a president may sometimes have to temper the short term passions of the public, a ruthless dictator is ipso facto a good president, is a false argument of insidious intent. Get it?

Dick likes to pose as the long suffering victim of unintelligent and unappreciative liberal advocates of popular sovereignty whom time will eventually exonerate and promote. As you may recall, we were suffocated with similar sentiments concerning the other Dick and so far Nixon looks worse with every passing year and every transcribed tape. I'm afraid glory will escape Dick Cheney in his lifetime and in saecula saeculorum unless of course honest history fails along with our democracy and our republic.

Cross posted from Human Voices

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3 Comments:

Blogger QueersOnTheRise said...

Dick comes from plain ol' middle class roots, just so you know, and drove a lovely Chevy Vega while in the Ford White House.

And if you were Dick Cheney, you too would be fed up with the lies and distortions directed at you and the President, such as your own implication that Bush is a "dictator." Really -- a twice elected (sorry about the whole Electoral College thing in 2000, but that's the way the Constitution goes; and please, spare me the blocked Black polling precinct shit), term limited President, with a 33% approval rating (even though that's way too high for you), with the opposition party in control of the Legislature. That's the real definition of dictator, all right!.

Meanwhile, the ingenious, anti-war democrats may blow one of the easier elections in history due to Hillary's entitlement mentality and Obama's arrogance.

6:27:00 AM  
Blogger Capt. Fogg said...

Where have I been talking about Cheney's "roots" whatever the hell that means? Where did I use the word dictator? Where did I talk about election improprieties? Where did I lie about Cheney? Where have you been that you haven't noticed what this administration has been doing.

Are you typing with one hand while thinking breathless thoughts about how you hate Democrats and love snarling old Dick and his wonderful war? because you're not arguing with me or anything I said - you're masturbating to a fantasy of your own creation - and a disgusting one at that.

Don't confuse your inferences with my implications. I say what I mean, while you just pull prefabricated, sophistic, simple-minded and irrelevant little bags of crap out of somewhere and try to burn them on my doorstep - perhaps hoping I'll step in it so you can laugh.

Go fight in this frigging war if you love it so much but find somewhere else to jerk off.

9:35:00 AM  
Blogger Libby Spencer said...

I've never thought of either Cheney or Nixon as anything but a Dick.

7:19:00 PM  

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